[ 259 ][ A Day In The Life … 3•29•2021 ]

[ Sometimes I Get So Tired I Feel Like I Can See My
     Own Thoughts ]
[ They Are In The Form Of Red & Yellow Spots ]

[ They Don’t Come Out In A Straight Line ]
[ @ Least Not Mine ]

[ Sometimes I Can Pick Out The Spots Of Others ]
[ Sad To Say ]
[ I Saw Some Really Dark Ones, That Were My Biological
     Mothers ]

[ The Mother That Signed Off ]
[ Then Ran Off ]

[ I Began Seeing My Thoughts @ A Very Young Age ]
[ Trying To Find An Outlet For My Rage ]

[ I Had To Learn To Self Soothe ]
[ When Things Were Not Going So Smooth ]

[ Some Days She Would Yell That I Was Cheating ]
[ Because I Always Tried Hide ]
[ When She Would Yell ( IT IS TIME FOR YOUR BEATING! ) ]

[ I Was So So Small ]
[ & I Was So Malnourished I Was Almost Bald ]

[ I Had Good Hiding Spots All Over The House ]
[ This All Started After My Dad Left ]
[ Her Spouse ]

[ Life Is Not Fair When I Am Forced To Sit There & Watch
     My Brother & Sister Eat ]
[ She Won’t Give Me My Shoes Back ]
[ So During Those Days When She Let’s Me Play Outside The
     Gravel Hurts My Feet ]

[ How Has My Stomach Found A Way ]
[ To Be Bulging Out ]
[ When I Have Had So Little Food In The Last 8 Days? ]

[ My Sister Treats Me Good ]
[ When She Takes A Huge Risk ]
[ & Smuggles Me Food ]

[ But I Am Very Sure ]
[ That My Mother Would Never Beat Her ]

[ She Has A Specific Certain Wire Hangar ]
[ That She HITS Me With ]
[ When She Takes Out Her Anger ]

[ Days End So Bad ]
[ After She Has Spent Hours On The Phone ]
[ Yelling @ My Dad ]

[ I Always Hated Those Calls ]
[ Because Then She Would Throw My Toys Against
     The Walls ]

[ I Only Had A Few That Were Not Broken ]
[ Or Taken ]

[ My Hunger Would Always Make Me Cry & Scream ]
[ When It Would Wake Her ]
[ From Her Drunken Stuper ]
[ She Can Be So Mean ]

[ Whenever My Stomach Uncontrollably Growls ]
[ She Gives Me The Hardest Scowl ]

[ Why Don’t I Ever Get Warm, Dry Clothes Like They
     Get? ]
[ The Clothes She Puts On Me Are Always Dirty & Wet ]

[ Yesterday All I Had To Eat Was Mashed Up Bananas
     In A Dirty Bowl ]
[ The Hunger Is Taking It’s Toll ]

[ I Wish The Babysitter Would Just Take Us ]
[ But I Don’t Think She Could Carry Three Kids When She
     Catches Her Bus ]

[ If Any Of Us Would Go ]
[ It Would Be My Brother ]
[ If She Would Ever Be Asked She Would Not Say ( NO ) ]

[ One Night When She Got Off Of The Phone She
     Seemed Quiet & Relieved ]
[ But I Also Heard Her Say ( MAYBE I SHOULD JUST PACK-UP
     & LEAVE ) ]

[ The Next Day I Found It Odd Because She Was Humming ]
[ She Also Said ( YOUR PIECE OF CRAP DAD IS COMING ) ]

[ She Yelled @ Me When We Were In The Car Saying
     ( IN TWO HOURS YOU WILL BE GONE ) ]
[ & ( THEN I CAN FINALLY MOVE ON! ) ]

[ But When We Went ]
[ There Was No Brent ]

[ So She Was True To Her Word ]
[ From That Point ]
[ Her Voice Was Never Ever Heard ]

~ The End ~

[ Auhea kuʻu hoaaloha ]
[ Ke manaʻoʻiʻo nei wau e pono ai e lawe i kēia moʻolelo
     i kahi hopena ]

[ Mahalo no ka hoʻoloheʻana i kaʻu mau moʻolelo ]
[ No laila,ʻoiaʻiʻo,ʻo ia ka mea ]

[ A hui hou aku ]
     ‎    ‎
[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]