(001)▪︎[ Working On … 2025 ]

What have you been working on?

[ The Main Thing That I Am Working On Is Myself ]

[ Trying To Be The Best Person That I Can Be, For Myself & Others ]

[ I Am Working On My Self-Esteem, Self-Confidence ]

[ I Am Working On Trying To Be The Best Husband. Because My Beautiful Bride Of Almost (30yrs) Deserves That ]

[ I Am Working On Trying Be Transparent To Others. Showing Others That There Is No Hidden Agenda In My Words, Or Actions ]

[ I Am Working On Trying To Be The Easiest, Less Demanding, Most Accommodating/Honest/Caring/Understanding Client To My “Dream Team” Of CG’s, Needle & Bump ]

[ I Am Working On Trying To Be The Best Kind Of Friend To My Handful Of Friends ]

[ I Am Working On Letting Go Of The Grudges That I Have Been Carrying With Me For All These Years ]

[ I Am Always Working On My Writing ]

[ I Am Working On Completing My ’75 Topps Mini’s Baseball Card Set That I Started (50yrs) Ago, But Then Set It Aside ]

[ I Working On My Diet So I Can Get My Much Needed Spinal Surgery ]

[ I Am Working On My Eating So I Can Lean Down To A Lower Weight ]

[ I Want To Work On My Baking Skills ]

[ I Am Working On Drinking More Water ]

[ This Has Become A Much Longer List Of “What I Am Working On” Than I Previously Imagined. It Looks Like I Have Alot Of Work I Should Be Doing! ]

~ Lopaka DeVoe ~

(681)▪︎[ The Bad Years … 8•16•2021 ]

[ There Were Years When All You Wanted To Do Was Just
Lay Down & Drift Off Into A Deep ]
[ Long Sleep ]

[ Could Anybody Take Your Pain Away? ]
[ Even For A Day? ]

[ If You Took All Of Those Pills, Would That Do The Trick? ]
[ You Had All Of Those Bottles From Which To Pick ]

[ Days Were Dark ]
[ You Had No Drive ]
[ You Felt Like You Were Stuck In Park ]
[ You Failed To Thrive ]

[ The Nights Were Even Darker ]
[ The Bad Images In Your Mind Were Always Larger ]

[ The Sounds Of That Person In Pain ]
[ You Heard Over & Over Again ]

[ Being Stuck In A (3) Hour Riot ]
[ Has Stolen All Of The Times When You Needed It To Be Quiet ]

[ There Was Nothing You Could Do ]
[ The Whole System Failed You ]

[ You Had To Listen To That Kid Getting Beat ]
[ All The While The Powers That Had Been There ]
[ Directed You To Take A Seat ]

[ This All Became Your PTSD In A Nutshell ]
[ So For So Many Years Your Memory Dragged You Through
Hell ]

[ You Can’t Say (& BACK) Because Sometimes Your Memory
Left You There ]
[ These Kinds Of Memories You NEVER Share ]
[ Unless You Wanted To Scare ]

[ Whoever You Were Talking To ]
[ Whenever You Were In A Flashback You Never Knew ]
[ What To Do ]

[ So Your Dark Days Extended To (21) Or (22) Hours Long ]
[ Everything In Your Head Was Wrong ]
[ You Stopped Feeling Strong ]

[ You Never Turned To Alcohol Or Any Illicit Drugs ]
[ You Never Turned Into A Thug ]

[ But You Did Turn Into Your Worst Enemy ]
[ You Could Not See ]
[ How Things Should Be ]
[ All Because Of Your PTSD ]

[ If Only You Could Go To Sleep For A Day Or Two ]
[ Would All Of These Sleeping Pills See You Through? ]

[ They Almost Did That ]
[ I Was @ The Count Of (2) On The Mat ]

[ But Then You Woke Up One Day ]
[ Then Decided That Wasn’t The Way ]

[ Everyday Since Then, You Walk The Fine ]
[ Imaginary Line ]

[ Do You Want To Go? ]
[ Or Do You Want To Stay? ]
[ Do You Always Know ]
[ That It Is Okay If You Are Not Feeling Okay? ]

[ You Say That Only The Wise ]
[ Recognize ]
[ The Prize ]

[ Through All The Angst & Strife ]
[ The Prize Is Living Your Life ]

[ The Best That You Possibly Can ]
[ & Try To Be Your Biggest Fan ]

~ Ka hopena ~

[ Mahalo ]
[ A hui hou ]
[ Aloha ]

[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]

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(960)▪︎[ What About … ? … 11•15•2020 ]

[ I Try To Find Ways ]
[ To Do, Say Or Find Things ]
[ That Brighten/ Break-Up Other People’s Days ]

[ It Is Not That I Have To ]
[ It Is What I Want To Do ]

[ Sometimes, Someday I’d Like To Look Down
@ My Phone & See ]
[ Someone, Anyone ]
[ Reaching Out To Me! ]

[ Out Of Love & Empathy ]
[ Sympathy ]
[ Honesty ]
[ But Never Out Of pity ]

[ Is That Too Big Of A Task ]
[ I Ask? ]

[ If That Is So ]
[ Who Is The One That Says So? ]
[ Okay Then … ]
[ I Think That I Will Just Go ]

~ The End ~

[ Mahalo ]
[ A hui hou aku ]
[ Aloha ] ‎
‎
[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]

[ 252 ][ Some Things Are Not Worth It … 3•27•2021 ]

[ Some Say That You Should Live Free Or Die Trying ]
[ But Some Could See ]
[ That Would Lead To A Life Filled With Many Nights Of Worrying
     & Crying ]

[ Crying Because You Did Not Want To Fight ]
[ Crying Because You Are Just Trying To Make It Through
     Another Night ]

[ The Nights Are The Worst ]
[ Some Nights Feel Like They Are Cursed ]

[ Cursed Because Of The Nightmares They Bring ]
[ Trying To Hide The Scars That Sting ]

[ The Unseen Wounds Hurt You The Most ]
[ & They Are Not From Events Where You Deserve To Boast ]

[ Situations Where The Words ]
[ Heard ]
[ Cut Much Deeper Than A Sharpened Sword ]

[ You Can Never Measure The Depth ]
[ Or The Length ]

[ But All Of The Lies ]
[ Does Increase The Wound’s Size ]

[ Then They Would Feel That All Eyes Would Go In Your
     Direction ]
[ Questioning Your Dedication ]

[ That Would Not Be Fair ]
[ That Would Show A Big Lack Of Care ]

[ Care About Your Feelings ]

~ The End ~

[ Auhea kuʻu hoaaloha ]
[ Ke manaʻoʻiʻo nei wau e pono ai e lawe i kēia moʻolelo
     i kahi hopena ]

[ Mahalo no ka hoʻoloheʻana i kaʻu mau moʻolelo ]
[ No laila,ʻoiaʻiʻo,ʻo ia ka mea ]

[ A hui hou aku ]
     ‎    ‎
[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]

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