[ Some Say That Solace Must Be Discovered ]
[ If You Lose It, Can It Be Recovered? ]
[ Sometimes Loneliness Can Zap Your Powers ]
[ You Can’t Wash Lonely Off In The Showers ]
[ It Would Be Nice If It Was Tangible & You Could Wash It
Off Of Your Back, Like Dirt ]
[ The Same Goes For Hurt ]
[ Both Of Those Are A Feeling ]
[ Both Of Those Could Send You Reeling ]
[ There Are Different Ways Of Getting Or Being Lonely In Life ]
[ The Worst Way ]
[ Would Be Losing Your Husband Or Wife ]
[ That Would Then Give You The Hurt That You Would Never
Have Dreamed Of ]
[ All Because You Lost The One Person Who Was Supposed
To Be YOUR Lifetime Love ]
[ That Kind Of Hurt Gives All Kinds Of Pain ]
[ That Kind Never Wanes ]
[ That Kind Of Pain You Can Not Wash Off ]
[ There Is More Pain When You Feel Totally Lost ]
[ Pain Is Pain ]
[ It Is What Everyone Disdains ]
~ Ka hopena ~
[ Mahalo E Ka hoa ]
[ A hui hou ]
[ Aloha ]
[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]
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Tag: #hurt
(172)▪︎[ Hurting … 2•22•2020 ]
[ I Hurt So Much Right Now ]
[ I Am Supposed To Pull It Together ]
[ But I Don’t Know How ]
[ I Lost My Younger Brother Brent A Couple Of Nights
Ago ]
[ He Passed As He Slept ]
[ & Now I Don’t Know ]
[ How Long I’ve Wept ]
[ He Was The Last Member Of My Family In My Mind ]
[ Oh If I Could Only Pound On The Button That Says
( REWIND! ) ]
[ I Don’t Know How Far Back In Years I Would Go ]
[ Then I’d Hit ( PLAY ) ]
[ & Take It Really Slow ]
[ You See, We Were Separated About When He Was One &
I Was Two ]
[ I Knew I Had A Brother Out There ]
[ Somewhere ]
[ But I Had No Clue ]
[ I Grew Up Not Asking Questions ]
[ Because It Seemed Like Nobody Cared ]
[ Or Nobody Knew ]
[ It Wasn’t Until After We Were Married & My Wife Asked ]
[ ( WOULD YOU MIND IF I LOOKED FOR YOUR BROTHER? ) ]
[ I Told Her That She Could Take On That Task ]
[ But I Don’t Want To Know A Thing About Our Mother ]
[ She Tracked Down The Police Report For When My Dad
Shot Himself In The Head ]
[ Seeing This Report Was Something That I Grew Up To Dread ]
[ The Report Sent Her In The Direction That Would Make
Her Rave & Rant ]
[ Because It Said That The Names Of His Children Was Bobby,
Robin & Brant ]
[ That Made The Direction Of The Hunt Juke ]
[ Instead Of Jive ]
[ It Seems That When Our Dad Got Depressed He Never Told The Truth ]
[ About His Intentions To Die ]
[ The Information That She Found Blew My Mind To Pieces ]
[ She Even Found Names Of Possible Nephews & Nieces ]
[ So He Said He Couldn’t Help Us Know A Man With Brant For
His Name ]
[ But He Stated That He Has An Uncle ( BRENT ) Who Sounded
The Same ]
[ He Told My Wife He Had His Number & North
Carolina Was Where He
Lived ]
[ He Had His Uncle’s Number & Then Said ( THIS IS ALL I HAVE TO GIVE ) ]
[ The Next Night I Sat Down & Picked Up The Phone ]
[ I Thought ( THIS IS LIKE WALKING INTO THE UNKNOWN ) ]
[ A Man’s Voice Came On & Sounded Kind Of Gruff ]
[ Asking Him About Five Questions Was Kind Of Rough ]
[ Then He Asked Two Questions That I Thought Was Strange
But Funny ]
[ ( WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME … DO YOU NEED A KIDNEY ) ]
[ That Was The Start Of What We Had ]
[ He Talked About The Kids Who Call Him Dad ]
[ Brent Was All Of The Family That I’ve Got ]
[ Now Death Has Taken Him ]
[ & All Of That Effort Was For Naught ]
~ Ka hopena ~
[ Mahalo iā ‘oe ]
[ A hui hou mākou ]
[ Aloha ]
[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]
(352)[ Not Good Company … 4•8•2020 ]
[ You Don’t Really Think That You Can Be Around Anyone Right Now ]
[ What You Want To Say ]
[ Probably Would Not Be Allowed ]
[ That Kind Of Counseling Sure Does Bring Up Alot Of Hurt ]
[ While Sitting There ]
[ You Were Sweating Through Your Two Shirts ]
[ Why Should He Respect You When She Shows That She Doesn’t ]
[ Through All These Years Where She Didn’t ]
[ He Sure Wasn’t ]
[ He Has Been Given So Many Opportunities To Say That He Does ]
[ Was He Ever Planning To? ]
[ Because He Acts Like He Never Was ]
[ She Has Been Given Every Opportunity To Believe
What She Can See ]
[ She Hasn’t In The Past ]
[ Because She Questions Your Honesty ]
[ & Questions You, Even Though You’ve Never
Given Her Any Cause ]
[ If You Had Anything To Say Then ]
[ You Are Now @ A Loss ]
~ Ka hopena ~
[ Mahalo iā ‘oe ]
[ A hui hou mākou ]
[ Aloha ]
[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]
(331)▪︎[ Goodbye Song … 4•1•2020 ].
[ These Last Three Days Have Been Some Of The Hardest
Days I Have Ever Had ]
[ They Didn’t Even Start Out Good ]
[ They Just Went Straight To Bad ]
[ I’ve Never Felt Like I Was Stuck On An Island Like I Do Now ]
[ I’m Trying To Get Off ]
[ But I Don’t Know Which Way Or How ]
[ I’ve Never Felt So Alone Because Of What You Had Said ]
[ Now Your Unbelievable Words ]
[ Continue To Ping Pong Around In My Head ]
[ If It Weren’t For The Sound Of The Birds ]
[ I’d Think That I Was Dead ]
[ This Last Year Things Have Stabbed Me So Many Times In
The Heart ]
[ If I’d Ever Want To Rebuild ]
[ I Literally Would Not Know Where To Start ]
[ Do I Have To Admit ]
[ That We’ve Grown Too Far Apart ]
[ @ This Juncture In Our Marriage I Never Thought That We Would Need Skyrockets ]
[ Or Bottlerockets ]
[ To Keep Us Going ]
[ But When You Look In My Direction ]
[ You Are No Longer Glowing ]
[ I Used To Get A Sparkle In Your Eye ]
[ When Did That Die? ]
[ It’s Like You Don’t Even Want To Try ]
[ To Still Be In Love With This Guy ]
[ I Can No Longer Get You To Laugh Or Smile ]
[ I No Longer Know How To Turn Your Sexual Dial ]
[ You Really Summed It Up When You Said That I’ve Really
Aged These Last Couple Of Years ]
[ Deep Down Inside ]
[ That Caused Alot Of Tears ]
[ It Looks Like I’ll Literally Have To Face That One
Comment Head On ]
[ I Guess My Youthful Looks Are Long Gone ]
~ Ka hopena ~
[ Mahalo iā ‘oe ]
[ A hui hou mākou ]
[ Aloha ]
[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]
(381)▪︎[ It Was Her … 4•16•2020 ]
[ Mourning The Inevitable, Seems Like a Waste Of Time ]
[ That’s Like Taking A Pair Of Old Tennis Shoes ]
[ & Trying To Make Them Shine ]
[ How Much Time & Effort Do You Put In? ]
[ If You Don’t Know When It Ends ]
[ How Do You Know Where To Begin ]
[ Quite A Conundrum That You Stepped Into ]
[ Does It Make You Blue? ]
[ Do You Know What To Do? ]
[ Then You Feel Like You Stepped Into Quicksand ]
[ If You Can ]
[ Can You Stand? ]
[ When You Struggle, You Sink ]
[ When You Relax ]
[ You Stay On Top, So You Can Blink ]
[ When You Try To Relax, You Have Cognitive Dissonance ]
[ Your Body Wants To Struggle ]
[ & You Don’t Have Any Confidence ]
[ Get Up & Get Out ]
[ Your Mind Tries To Shout ]
[ Will Anyone Miss You? ]
[ Will Anyone Come To Help You? ]
[ Will Anyone Save You? ]
[ Do You Deserve To Be Saved? ]
[ If You Get Out Will You Behave? ]
[ Now You See Someone On The Horizon ]
[ Do They Have A Phone ]
[ & Their Service Is Through Verizon? ]
[ You Try To Shout, But You Can’t Make A Sound ]
[ You Struggle & Start Sinking Down ]
[ Then Your Hand Feels A Rope ]
[ & You Are Pulled Out To Dry Ground ]
[ & You Feel Through Happenstance ]
[ You’ve Been Given A Second Chance ]
[ @ Life ]
[ When You Look Up To See Who Was There ]
[ You See Your Wife ]
[ Then You Are Startled Awake & It Seems ]
[ You Were Having One Of Your Bad Dreams ]
[ Then You Look @ Your Wife & You Know Something You Should
Give ]
[ You Give Her This Look ]
[ That Tells Her She’s The Reason You Live ]
~ Ka hopena ~
[ Mahalo iā ‘oe ]
[ A hui hou mākou ]
[ Aloha ]
[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]
(333)▪︎[ What Pain? … 4•22•2021 ]
[ There Is So Much Pain Busting @ The Seams In Your Heart ]
[ When Another Dart Is Thrown ]
[ It Continues To Tear You Apart ]
[ It May Be A Word ]
[ That You Heard ]
[ Or An Action That Was Done ]
[ But You Found Out A Long Time Ago ]
[ That Hurtful Words Are Things That You Cannot Out Run ]
[ They Find You By Seeking You Out ]
[ It Could Be A Whisper ]
[ Or It Could Be A Shout ]
[ The Whispered Hurtful Words Do Not Draw A Crowd ]
[ But, What Always Does ]
[ Are The Ones That Are Said Out Loud ]
[ Those Are The Ones That Always Draws Others Attention ]
[ & Because It Does ]
[ There Are Higher Levels Of Contention ]
[ Sometimes Hurtful Words Are Said Because Someone
Lied ]
[ When Hurtful Words Are Said ]
[ You Want To Run & Hide ]
[ Not In A Playful Way Of Another Game Of Hide -n- Seek ]
[ These Words Can Create Such Big Problems ]
[ It Could Cause Two People To Not Want To Speak ]
[ To Each Other ]
[ Like To Your Father ]
[ Like With Your Mother ]
[ That Has Happend So Many Times In Your Past ]
[ Their Grudges Were Created To Last ]
[ You Were Written Off By Both Your Dad & Mom ]
[ @ One Time You Were Dealing With Don ]
[ Then You Had To Deal With Barbara’s Bomb ]
[ Through The Whole Accusatory Conversation You Had
With Barbara You Remained Respectful ]
[ You Did Not Need To Be ]
[ You Did Not Have To Be ]
[ So You Were Careful ]
[ Because You Were Expected To Be ]
[ Because You Were Raised To Be ]
[ You Had So Many Occasions Where You Could Have Laughed
It Off ]
[ & You Had Just As Many Times Where You Could Have Said
( FUCK YOU BARBARA ) In A Fake Cough ]
[ One Problem Is That You Don’t Go Against How You Were
Raised ]
[ This Was The Under The Same Roof Where You Craved ]
[ To Be Praised ]
[ But It Never Came ]
[ That Is Why Mom & Dad Were Never Looked @ The Same ]
[ That Is Why ( MOM ) & ( DAD ) Were No Longer Their
Names ]
~ The End ~
[ Mahalo ]
[ A hui hou aku ]
[ Aloha ]
[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]
Lopaka's Poetic Stories Blog 