(491)▪︎[ Unresolved Grief … 12-31-2025 ]

[ Have You Ever Felt Like You Have Some Unresolved Grief ]
[ That Needs Some Closure? ]
[ But, When You Go Looking For Some Relief ]
[ Are You Afraid Of More Exposure? ]

[ Of What Has Been Bugging You About Your Past? ]
[ You Begin To Worry That Your Troubled Mind Might Last ]
[ & The Dye Might Have Been Cast ]

[ Your Troubled Event Happened Over (23yrs) Prior ]
[ Through (4) Completely Hostile Interrogations ]
[ They Always Called You A Liar ]
[ Which Led To So Many Frustrations ]
[ Lighting Your Whole Life On Fire ]

[ You Fell Into A Rabbit Hole Where You Did Not See A Way Out ]
[ All Of The Powers That Be ]
[ Wanted You To Go Home & Sit In The Dark & Pout ]
[ Wallowing About The Injustices Of Humanity ]
[ You Got To To Be Too Tired To Scream & Shout ]

[ Everytime You Looked Around ]
[ You Found ]
[ That The Whole Gravity Of The State Kept Pounding ]
[ You Into The Ground ]

[ The World Started Spinning ]
[ You Saw No End ]
[ You Never Noticed When This Mess Was Even Beginning ]
[ They Left You With Nothing Left To Defend ]
[ Nor Was There Any Chance Of Winning ]

[ What Was Left? ]
[ Going Back To A Job Where You fHad To Constantly Watch Your Step? ]

[ What Would Happen To Your Free Will? ]
[ When The Only Way Of Feeling Okay ]
[ Would Be Taking An Anxiety Pill ]
[ (3×) A Day ]

[ You Fail To See The Joy In Being A Pharmaceutical Experiment ]
[ Always Feeling Different ]
[ & Not Confident ]

[ The Event Broke You @ The Time ]
[ All Because Those (2) Male Juveniles ]
[ Wanted To Commit One More Major Crime ]
[ & Go Out In Style ]

[ You Were Never Given The Choice Of Having A Representative From The Union Stand By Your Side ]
[ They Never Gave You The Chance To Decide ]
[ Or Confide ]
[ So Afterwards There Was Nothing Left Of Your Pride! ]

[ Because Of Your Lack Of Training, Your Hope Of Figuring Things Out Were Dampened ]
[ & Hampered ]
[ Because Through The Whole History Of Being Opened ]
[ This Event Had Never Before Happened ]

[ Getting On The Right Path ]
[ Became As Complicated ]
[ As Solving Story Problems In Calculus Math ]
[ Without A Single Number Being Duplicated ]

[ Because Feeling This Lost Was Unknown Territory For You ]
[ There Was Nothing To Do ]
[ Because No One Had A Clue ]
[ About How To Keep You From Feeling So Blue ]

[ & Down On Your Luck ]
[ You Wish That It Would Have Been As Easy As Needing To Duck ]
[ So That Made Every Day Suck! ]

[ But You Persevered & Came Out On The Other End, A Much Better & Stronger Man ]
[ You No Longer Feel Like You Are Sinking In Quicksand ]

~ Ka hopena ~

Mahalo nui loa
A hui hou kaua e kuu hoa

Na,
Lopaka DeVoe

~ Aloha ~

|| ● ▪︎ ▪︎ ■ ▪︎ ▪︎ ● ||

(019)▪︎[ What She Does … 2024 ]

[ You Do Not Like, The Playing Of This Song ]
[ It Always Reminds You, That She Would Get All Of The Words Wrong ]
[ & That Your Marriage, Did Not Last Very Long ]

[ Nothing In Life, Really Does ]
[ The Wolves Were Always Knocking @ The Door ]
[ Arriving Every Hour, On The Hour, Off Of The Bus ]
[ Every Hour, Bringing More, Than The Hour Before ]

[ Why Was This Permanent Path There, In The First Place? ]
[ Was It Just To Catch A Glimpse Of Her Body ]
[ Or Her Face? ]

[ You Could Always Bet ]
[ That They Had Yet ]
[ To See Her Greatest Asset ]

[ That Would Be Her Dynamic Personality ]
[ That Most Men Only Read About ]
[ But Never Experienced In Reality ]

[ Ever Since Meeting Her, You Began To Feel Alive ]
[ Before Her, Year After Year ]
[ Would Take Your Pitiful Life On An Ever Deeper Dive ]
[ Making Your Way Through Every Gin Joint So You Could Consume Beer After Beer ]

[ Until You Would Drink Well Over (2) Cases In As Little Time As (3) Nights ]
[ Choosing To Pick Fights ]
[ With Every Little Thing That Caused You To Have Night Frights ]

[ You Were Always Haunted By The Death Of Your First Wife ]
[ Because Of Your Drunk Driving ]
[ Your Car Crash Took Her & Both Of Your Twin Daughter’s Lives ]

[ She Just Turned (37) ]
[ Megan & Julliette Just Turned (10) ]
[ All (3) Are Forever Together Up In Heaven ]
[ Boy Do You Think Of Them Often ]

[ Unfortunately, You Walked Away From That Crash With Barely A Scratch On Your Wretched Self ]
[ After That Horrific Night, You Have Rarely Thought Of Anything Else ]
[ Even After (17) Years Your Self-Esteem Was Sitting Still In The Garage On A Shelf ]

[ Every Time That You Get Temporarily Stupid & Reach For A Single Drink ]
[ You Have To Stop & Really Think ]
[ Those Decades Almost Pushed You To The Brink ]

[ You Should Take Their Deaths, As Just A Stepping Stone ]
[ The Problems Only Arise ]
[ When You Have To Deal With The Death Of Loved Ones, All Alone ]

Mahalo
~LopakaDeVoe~

(1062)▪︎[ In Your Time Of Grief … 2023 ]

[ Tomorrow, Is A Day, That Every Mother & Grandmother, Will Always Dread ]
[ Their Grand Son & Their Dreams For Him ]
[ Are Now Gone ]
[ There Wilĺ Not, Be Any More Future, For Him Up Ahead ]

[ You Don’t Mean To Be That Blunt, That Was Not, Your Intention ]
[ Science, Is An Amazing Field ]
[ But They Have Yet, To Make An Invention ]
[ That Causes, Death To Yield ]

[ A Grandma, Is Not Supposed To Bury, A Grandson ]
[ There Are, @ Least A Dozen, Other Things ]
[ That Could Be Done ]
[ That Brings ]
[ Alot More Happiness & Fun ]

[ Once Again, Hopes Have Been Dropped ]
[ Dreams, Concerning Wedo, Have Been Stopped ]
[ The Fantasy Balloon, For His Life, Has Been Popped ]

[ He Had So Much Life Ahead Of Him, Then ]
[ Now The Lone Question ]
[ Could Be, When? ]

[ Isaiah, Is Trying To Make Sense, Of It All ]
[ That Could Wind Him Up ]
[ As Tight As A Rubber Ball ]

[ He Might Be Swimming Against The Current Of The River Of Denial ]
[ His State Of Mind ]
[ Might Be Like That, For Awhile ]

[ Another Life, Cut Short, @ Such A Young Age ]
[ How Does Anyone Know, In Their Life Book ]
[ They Are About To Turn, The Last Page ]

[ No One Can Foretell, What Comes Next ]
[ You Never Get, Instructions, For This ]
[ Sent To You, By A Text ]

[ Here Is Hoping, That With Time, You Will Gain Peace ]
[ & Your Sorrow, Will Cease ]

[ When The Sun Comes Up, Signaling A New Day ]
[ But It Is Not The Same ]
[ That Could Be God’s Way ]
[ Of Saying, Wedo’s Name ]

(•)•||●||▪︎•▪︎•▪︎||●||•▪︎•▪︎••▪︎▪︎•▪︎•||●||▪︎•▪︎•▪︎||●||•(•)

~ Ka hopena ~

[ Mahalo E Ka hoa ]
[ A hui hou ]
[ Aloha ]

[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ] [酪]

(•)•||●||▪︎•▪︎•▪︎||●||•▪︎•▪︎••▪︎▪︎•▪︎•||●||▪︎•▪︎•▪︎||●||•(•)

(296)▪︎[ Grieving … 3•23•2020 ]

[ How Does One Grieve? ]
[ Help Me Believe ]

[ That Sometime In The Future I’ll See My Brother Again? ]
[ What If I Sin? ]

[ Does My Brother ]
[ Go One Way ]
[ & I Go The Other? ]

[ Some People Say That Everything Happens For A Reason ]
[ That is One Thing That I Don’t Believe In ]

~ Ka hopena ~

[ Mahalo E Ka hoa ]
[ A hui hou ]
[ Aloha ]

[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ] [🤙]

(•)||▪︎•▪︎•▪︎||●||•▪︎•▪︎••▪︎•▪︎•||●||▪︎•▪︎•▪︎||(•)

[276]▪︎[ Passing Of His Dog … 4•14•2022 ]

[ When A Man Loses His Dog, It Can Be Devastating ]
[ There Is No Such Thing As Compensating ]

[ As Much As He Tries ]
[ There Are Moments When He Cries ]

[ A Man’s Best Friend ]
[ To The Very End ]

[ He Has Felt Pain Before, But Not This Kind ]
[ This Encompasses The Whole Mind ]

[ He Can’t Eat ]
[ This Is Something That Will Be Hard To Beat ]

[ His Dog Is With Him Every Minute That He Is Home ]
[ To The Dog, His Location Is Always Known ]

[ When The Dog Comes In From The Backyard, It Is His Owner
That He Seeks ]
[ Then Laying Right @ His Feet ]

[ He Does Not Care If His Legs Swell ]
[ Or His Feet Smell ]

[ A Man’s Dog Does Not Worry About The Weather ]
[ The Main Point Is That They Are Together ]

[ He Really Gets A Kick ]
[ When It Is Just The Two Of Them ]
[ Speeding Down The Backroads In His Truck, Listening To
Country Music ]

[ On The Other Hand, Without Fail ]
[ When The Man Comes Home From Work ]
[ The Dog Should Be By The Front Door Wagging It’s Tail ]

[ His Best Friend Follows Him Everywhere ]
[ How Many Times Has He Gotten Underneath Other People’s
Feet? ]
[ All Of The Time ]
[ How Many Times For Him, Never ]

[ His Dog Wants To Lick Everybody’s Face ]
[ When He Puts His Face, Nose To Nose ]
[ The Dog’s Tongue Stays In Place ]

[ A Reminder Of His Dog Is In Every Room In The House ]
[ This Is One Of Those Times When He Leans On His Spouse ]

[ The Memories That A Man Has With His Dog Are Many ]
[ The Number Of People Who Understand His Grief ]
[ Is Probably Not Any ]

[ Even Though His Best Friend Is Gone ]
[ Life Keeps Chugging On ]

[ The Man’s Grief Is Deep ]
[ He Doesn’t Get Much Sleep ]

[ He Stares @ His Dog’s Bed ]
[ How Does He Get Right In His Head ]

[ Wrong Body Part ]
[ The Hurt Is In His Heart ]

~ Ka hopena ~

[ Mahalo E Ka hoa ]
[ A hui hou ]
[ Aloha ]

[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ] [酪]

||•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•||

(1021)▪︎[ What Is A Loss? … 12•5•2021 ]

[ How Much Is Enough? ]
[ How You Keep Going, Has Got To Be Tough ]

[ When You Have A Loss, You Mourn ]
[ Your Life’s Clock Is Ticking Right When You Are Born ]

[ This Is Inevitable, You Have To Remember ]
[ You Will Forever Have This Bad Memory Of This December ]

[ You Will Write A Story, Then Whatever Thoughts Are Next ]
[ There Will Come A Day Soon, When You Won’t Get Another One
Of Her Texts ]

[ When She Would Come To See You, She Was Always A Breath
Of Fresh Air ]
[ All That She Wanted For You Was Love & Care ]

[ She Did Not Play With Your Heart Or Your Emotions ]
[ All That She Gave Was Love & Devotion ]

[ You Filled A Big Void In Her Life ]
[ She Was Never, Ever A Threat To Your Wife ]

[ & What Does She Do? ]
[ She Loves Your Wife, Too ]

[ It Was Always A Good Bet ]
[ That Your Best Friend, Was Never A Threat ]

[ When Will It Be Enough, To Humble You? ]
[ You Have No Clue ]

[ You Thought That You Were Humbled Years Ago ]
[ Ever Since Then You Just Tried To Go With The Flow ]

[ You Were Never A Leader ]
[ & You Were Never A Defeater ]

[ Someone That Goes Around Making Others Feel Defeated ]
[ That’s Never Needed ]

[ Nobody Needs A Reminder Of A Loss ]
[ That Is Someone That You Would Never Want To Come Across ]

~ Ka hopena ~

[ Mahalo E Ka hoa ]
[ A hui hou ]
[ Aloha ]

[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]

||•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•||

(1009)▪︎[ What Is This Reason? … 11•30•2021 ]

[ Well That Was Something That You Never Expected ]
[ Was There A Sign That You Neglected? ]

[ Your Best Friend Just Talked To You On The Phone ]
[ & Told You Something That Was Previously Unknown ]

[ You Never Knew That Her Cancer Was That Bad ]
[ It Would Be A Huge Understatement To Say That You Were A
Little Sad ]

[ A Little Bit? ]
[ Holy Shit! ]

[ It Was A Kick In The Butt ]
[ It Was Also A Punch To The Gut ]

[ You Don’t Want To Feel This Broken ]
[ You Don’t Want Your Best Friend Taken ]

[ She Is So Important In Your Life ]
[ The Most Important Person, Behind Your Wife ]

[ Your Best Friend Has The Biggest Balls Of Anyone That You
Have Ever Met ]
[ She Has Taught You To How To Have Your Own Big Set ]

[ It Has Helped You & Your Marriage Tremendously ]
[ You Will Miss Her Tremendously ]

[ Your Love & Support For Her Is Off The Chart ]
[ Right Now You Have A Broken Heart ]

[ You Don’t Want Someone Coming Up To You & Tell You That
Everything Happens For A Reason ]
[ Really? ]
[ WTF Is This Reason? ]

~ Ka hopena ~

[ Mahalo E Ka hoa ]
[ A hui hou ]
[ Aloha ]

[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]

||•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•▪︎•||

(200)▪︎[ Grieving & Leaving … 3•1•2020 ]

A[ This Grieving Stuff Is For The Birds ]
[ My Thoughts Are All Consuming ]
[ But I Can’t Put All Of Them Into Words ]

[ Is There A Special Way To Grieve ]
[ Without Making Your Sanity Leave? ]

[ Like The Falling Leaf ]
[ Can It Be Brief? ]

[ Nothing About Grieving Makes Sense ]
[ It’s As Predictable As Getting A Smile ]
[ On The Face Of Vice-President Pence ]

[ Make Your Life ]
[ Like ]
[ Dice ]
[ Throw Them Against The Wall, Twice ]

[ That’s Like My Thoughts Being Rearranged ]
[ Sometimes They Seem Caged ]

[ All Pent Up In A Little Box ]
[ Who Has The Key, Goldilocks? ]

[ I Wish These Thoughts Of Mine ]
[ Would Fall Into Line ]
[ With Nine Rows Of Nine ]
[ Then They’d Take Me Dakine ]

~ Ka hopena ~

[ Mahalo iā ‘oe ]
[ A hui hou mākou ]
[ Aloha ] ‎
‎
[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]

(173)▪︎[ You’re Gone Now … 2•23•2020 ]

[ Oh Brother Brent, Brother Brent ]
[ Now Who Am I Supposed To Call To Vent? ]

[ Besides My Son & My Wife ]
[ You Were One Of The Biggest, Most Important & Loved
Parts Of My Life ]
[ Now My Heart, Feels Like It’s Been Cut Out, With A Knife ]

[ Then One Night, When You Couldn’t Hang On ]
[ One Swipe Of Death’s Hand ]
[ & You Were Gone ]

[ Now I Sit & Wonder, About Where The Time Went ]
[ Who Is Responsible For The Bad Times That Were Sent? ]
[ It Wasn’t Superman ]
[ Or Clark Kent ]

[ What Ever Happened, I’ll Never Know ]
[ Why Did You, Have To Go? ]
[ I’ll Never Know ]
[ Why Do I Feel, So Low? ]
[ This, I Know ]

[ I Feel, For Your Family Members ]
[ They Will Always Have Memories Of You, That They Will
Remember ]

[ I Know, That I Do ]
[ I Will Always Remember The Days, When We Came Out
To North Carolina ]
[ & Met You ]

[ I Had To Wait ]
[ All Of Those Years ]
[ Until 1998 ]

[ We Were Apart For Over 30 Years, But Not Of Our Doing ]
[ Growing Up Knowing You Were Out There, But We
Could Not Meet ]
[ Was Quite Grueling ]

[ I Remember What You Asked When I First Called You In N.C. ]
[ ( WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME? ) ]
[ ( DO YOU NEED A KIDNEY? ) ]

[ I Thought That I Could Not Get That Comment From No Other ]
[ I Said To You ]
[ ( WELL, I AM CALLING YOU BECAUSE I THINK YOU ARE MY
BROTHER ) ]

[ I Didn’t Know What To Expect ]
[ But You Did Not Scoff & Show Disrespect ]

[ It Is Hard To Talk About You In The Past Tense ]
[ Especially When None Of This Makes Sense ]

[ We Hardly Scratched The Surface Of Brotherhood ]

~ Ka hopena ~

[ Mahalo iā ‘oe ]
[ A hui hou mākou ]
[ Aloha ] ‎
‎
[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]

(154)▪︎[ Give Myself A Talk … 2•17•2020 ]

[ I Tell You This ]
[ I’ll Tell You No Lie ]
[ That When Death Gave You It’s Kiss ]
[ I Had To Try ]
[ To Keep A Dry ]
[ Eye ]

[ You Were My Last String ]
[ Connecting Me To This Messed Up Family Thing ]
[ Now, Who Will Bring ]

[ Such Laughter ]
[ Only During Our Phone Calls ]
[ Not After ]

[ We’d Punch Each Other Silly With Our Put-Downs ]
[ We’d Take Turns Being The Clown ]
[ You Were Supposed To Take Me To Our Home Island ]
[ & Show Me The Town ]

[ All Of Our Dreams Of Growing Old Together ]
[ Has Changed As Fast As The Oregon Weather ]

[ All Because Of This I Ask ]
[ Why Did You Not Complete The Simple Task ]
[ Of Putting On Your Mask ]
[ During The Night After Last ]

[ Maybe You Are Now Sending Me A Message, In Your Own Way ]
[ If I Want To Wake To See Another Day ]

[ I Must Fight ]
[ To Make Things Right ]
[ By Making Sure That MY Mask Must Be On Tight ]
[ Night After Night ]

[ So Everytime I Balk ]
[ I Should Give Myself A Good Talk ]

~ Ka hopena ~

[ Mahalo iā ‘oe ]
[ A hui hou mākou ]
[ Aloha ] ‎
‎
[ Na ]
[ Lopaka DeVoe ]