(085)▪︎[ Just Existing … 1•27•2022 ]

[ What Would It Feel Like Being Stuck, Penniless, Hungry, Angry &
     Alone? ]
[ You Have No Idea How Long It Had Been Since You Last Got
     A Text On Your Phone ]

[ You Feel Like You Are On An Island, But You Have (4) Walls ]
[ On & Off During The Day, You Feel The Tightening Of Your
     Jaws ]

[ You Have Lost Track Of The Days & Weeks ]
[ You Feel A Burning Sensation, Inside Both Cheeks ]

[ You Have A Huge Knot, On The Right Side Of Your Back ]
[ You Can’t Afford An Actual Meal ]
[ Not Even A Snack ]

[ You Do Not Recall The Last Time You Ate ]
[ You Are Not Trying To ]
[ But You Can Tell That You Are Losing Weight ]

[ The Light In Your Room Flickers On & Off ]
[ You Have Had The Cold Sweats ]
[ & A Really Deep, Barking Cough ]

[ There Is No Medication That Would Agree With Your System ]
[ Nothing Prescribed By Your P.C. Doctor ]
[ Not By Any Of Them ]

[ You Cannot Remember The Last Time That You Left The House
     For Pleasure ]
[ You Used To Get Coins From The Bank ]
[ As You Hunted For Treasure ]

[ You Used To Look Through So Many Pennies, Nickels & Dimes ]
[ Hours After Hours ]
[ Yes, Those Were Good Times ]

[ But After Your Spouse ]
[ Left The House ]

[ Things Have Never Been The Same ]
[ You Can Not Find Your Wife Anymore ]
[ Because She Changed Her Whole Name ]

[ Without Telling You ]
[ Without Leaving A Clue ]

[ You Have Thought Of Taking A Whole Bottle Of Store Bought
     Sleeping Pills ]
[ But You Found In The Past That It Did Not Even Make You Feel
     Ill ]
[ It Only Gave You Cold Sweats & Then The Chills ]

[ A Single Ambien Usually Knocks The Average Person On
     Their Ass ]
[ But You Took (28) Of Them Really Fast ]
[ Using The Last Swallow Of Soda, That You Had In Your Glass ]

[ You Waited All Night To Fall Asleep ]
[ After A Couple Of Hours You Were Able To Drift Away ]
[ But You Didn’t Go Very Deep ]

[ You Startle Yourself Awake, Way To Early In The Morning ]
[ Then You Have Flashbacks Throughout The Whole Day & Night
     Without A Second’s Worth Of Warning ]

[ You Feel That All You Do Is Exist ]
[ You Are Not Enjoying Your Hobbies ]
[ So You Are Not Making A Single List ]

[ You Like To Inventory Everything That You Have Collected ]
[ Now All Your Hobbies Sit Neglected ]

[ Ever Since You Were A Teen Boy ]
[ Your Life Had Found Very Little Joy ]

[ You Always Wished That As You Grew Older You Would Come
     Across Some ]
[ Nothing Ever Came ]
[ Everyday Was The Same ]
[ Making You Feel Dumb ]

[ There Are Some Days & Nights ]
[ You Do Not Stand Up To Turn On The Lights ]

[ The Only Times That You Get Up, Is To Go To The Bathroom &
     Back Again ]
[ You Guess Your Dad Was Right When He Told You ]
[ (YOU WILL NEVER MAKE IT, YOU WILL NEVER WIN) ]

~ Ka hopena ~

[  Mahalo E Ka hoa  ]
[  A hui hou  ]
[ Aloha  ]

[  Na  ]
[  Lopaka DeVoe  ]

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